Maybe I'm just crazy. Here I am with a healthy pregnancy, almost into the 2nd trimester. Couldn't be more excited. And yet.... pregnancy announcements and updates on Facebook still bug the crap out of me.
Now don't get me wrong. I really am happy for my pregnant FB friends. It's just the "Hey FB world, check out my pee stick!" or the "We haven't even had our first doctor appointment yet but we're going to announce this pregnancy with a picture of the onesies we already went out and bought", followed by several obnoxious and/or "complaining" status updates. That's what gets to me.
Of course, I will eventually need to come out on FB, but I am going to hold out at least until this becomes obvious to people IRL. DH thinks we shouldn't need to announce on FB at all. But the thing is, I know my family will be uploading a slew of pictures come Christmas time. So I'd rather make a tasteful announcement sometime before all my FB friends get bombarded with pics that may include Ruth+more.
After witnessing much obnoxious FB behavior from others, I have come up with a list of things I vow never to do once I go public. Seriously readers, if I break any of these you have my full permission to slap me straight:
I vow to demonstrate an awareness that the majority of my friends do not need to see objects that have recently come in contact with my bodily fluids.
Hey everybody! Check out this TP I just wiped with.....wait, you mean that's not socially acceptable??
I vow never to disclose the explicit details of what just came out of my stomach.
......or rather, what's NOT coming out. Status update: "I just wish I could poop. Oh the joys of pregnancy..."
I vow never to complain of weight gain, or of all the things I'm not allowed to have.
Wishing for a drink? Seriously? Alcohol is the LAST thing I want to think about going in my mouth. Of course there are some things I miss.... Status update: "I just wish I could get freaky nasty with my hubby again, without being uncomfortable. Oh the woes of carrying a child in my uterus...."
I solemnly swear never to use the word "prego" unless I'm discussing a recipe for chicken parmesan.
Ok ok I know, that's just my own damn problem and I need to get over my disdain for that word. DH is trying to desensitize me by calling me "prego" and "preggy" and every other name in the book.
Even if this pregnancy consumes me, I promise not to let it consume those on my news feed.
Susy: "I just discovered that I like coffee."
comment: "I love coffee! But I can't have any because I'm pregnant."
(This was an actual exchange I saw between 2 FB friends)
Sally: "I'm so happy I aced my psychology exam today!"
comment: "Hooray! I aced my exam too...at the OB's office....because I'm pregnant!"
Places: Sammy was at The Grocery Mart on Grocery Avenue.
comment: "Hey while you're there, could you get me some pickles? I'm all out. It's an emergency....because I'm pregnant!"
Selma: "I'm loving this beautiful weather today."
comment: "Me too. Did I mention that I'm pregnant????"