Still here

Hello blogworld!  It's been a while since my last post so I thought I'd just let everyone know that I'm still alive.  Not much happening here, except that I've been a bit of an emotional wreck for the past couple of weeks.  Usually, it takes a LOT to make me physically cry, but lately just the littlest things get the waterworks going.  I should be happy after finding out what is wrong with DH, and believe me I am SO thankful for all we do have.  I guess the "novelty" has worn off and reality has struck back.  I am still an outsider, awkwardly separated from people wherever I go: work, church, etc.  Can't even be happy and positive without getting shot down. 

Probably what is getting to me the most is realizing how extremely difficult this process is going to be, with no guarantee that it will work.  On top of that, it's almost certain that we are going to be making the big move to Cali this year.  So there goes our "Oklahoma baby."  Pretty sure that after the u/s in 2 weeks, any other TTC efforts will be put on hold.  I mean sure we COULD try to go ahead and do the MESA and get some little swimmers frozen while we're here (and I know it sounds bad, but I would almost feel more secure doing that).  But what if after we move they won't allow the sperm to be shipped halfway across the country?  Or what if something goes wrong in the shipping process?  I'm not going to make DH get his balls sliced open twice.  Besides, he's already said that if we're moving, he's not going to do the procedure here.  So that means that technically we'll be kicked back to "waiting to try" status.....and who knows how long that wait will be.

BTW, for those of you who are wondering, I still haven't told my parents yet.  I wanted to last week, but DH really needed to finish his work for his final grad school application.  Today would have been perfect, but my dad couldn't even drive up from TX (and no way were we going on the road) because of the ice/snow storm.  Hopefully next weekend my dad will be there and we can drive down and get it over with. 

Sorry for such a melancholy post.  I hope I'll be in a more cheerful mood on my next post.  In the meantime, enjoy a snow/ice pic.  (I just hope these frozen trees don't fall on any power lines!)